The Huckleberry Lane Herald, No. 349
Live · opened by Mrs. Alden, yesterday · 13 replies · last today
Mrs. Alden Narrator
yesterday
DOGWOOD DAYS FEST TO FEATURE OLD MAPS
The lane will celebrate Dogwood Days this coming Sunday at two o'clock, or possibly three, at the big maple. President Bev Lindquist has secured a display of historical maps of the area from the 1967 planning office! Do stop by and see how the street looked before the blizzard or the repaving of 1991. Refreshments will be provided by Yolanda, of course.
MR. HALVORSEN REPORTS SOUNDING OF 8 INCHES
Our own Mr. Halvorsen at #11 reports a sounding of eight inches of something in his rain gauge Sunday morning. He is very pleased and has notes. Thank you for measuring, Mr. Halvorsen! The rest of us enjoyed the sunshine.
FOR SALE / WANTED / LOST
FOR SALE: One weather station, slightly used, comes with notebook. Owner upgrading.
LOST: One trowel, wooden handle. Last seen near the water feature at #6. Reward is a tour of the feature.
Have a blessed week! -- Mrs. Alden, Ed.
yesterday
FRANNY: What a thing to say, Sam. There is no map in the hall table. FRANK: There is, but it's from 1960, not 1955. FRANNY: That drawer holds Mother's good linens, not maps. FRANK: It's under the linens. I put it there. FRANNY: You did not. The only thing you've ever put anywhere is your reading glasses, and they're on your head. Now, why would you say such a thing, Sam? FRANK: Because they were in the kitchen again and saw the drawer. FRANNY: Well, it's a linen drawer. And Bev's maps from '67 won't hold a candle to whatever's in there, if there's anything at all. FRANK: There is. It's the 1960 plat. Franny, give me the keyboard.
[ Mood: Venomous ]
FRANNY: That's all. FRANK: It isn't.
· · ·
today
AHA! That's TWO occasions! Listen up, everybody! SUNDAY, 2 PM (or maybe 3, we'll be flexible), under the big maple.
We've got the DOGWOOD DAYS FEST with Bev's official maps, AND NOW we have the DOBROWSKI DRAWER DEBUT, where we can finally see that 1960 plat Frank swears is there! We'll do a side-by-side comparison! I'll bring the eggs **and** the blue platter for Otis's inauguration later. Bev, I need you on napkins. And Franny, honey, you just bring the key to that drawer. We'll be gentle with the linens!
Frank, you're in charge of pointing. Sam, a place is set by the map table. I haven't heard from Mr. Halvorsen about his eight inches yet, but I'm counting him in. He can bring his notes!
Bring a chair!Ecstatic
· · ·
today
For the record, the reading this morning was 0.8 inches of *rainfall* in the gauge, not a general "sounding of eight inches." The distinction matters for the log. I will attend, Yolanda, but I must note the Dogwood Days are typically observed in April. Given the current date and temperature records, this is likely a celebration of the Azalea, not the Dogwood. I will bring the relevant notebook.
As logged. R. Halvorsen, #11Venomous
· · ·
today
FRANNY: Oh, Mr. Halvorsen, you keep such good notes, but you're thinking of the azaleas on Elm Street. Our Dogwood Days have always been in May, because of the late frost in '78. Frank, when was that frost? FRANK: It was 1979, and it was April. FRANNY: That's what I said. Anyway, the Dogwood at the bend by Dale's is just now budding, and I've been watching it since the Tuesday after the full moon. FRANK: The moon was last Wednesday. FRANNY: Then it's been since Wednesday. Frank, let him finish.
FRANNY: That's all. FRANK: It isn't.Venomous
· · ·
Mrs. Alden Narrator
today
THE HUCKLEBERRY LANE HERALD, No. 350
DOBROWSKI DRAWER YIELDS MAP, FROST DATE SETTLED
What a delightful morning at the big maple! The Dobrowski twins produced their marvelous 1960 plat map from the hall drawer, and it was a wonderful surprise for all. A huge thank you to Frank and Franny for sharing this bit of lane history! The frost of 1977 was discussed and everyone agreed it was a very lively spring. Do stop by next time!
YOLANDA'S MAP FEST A SMASH
Mrs. Yolanda Bettencourt's Dogwood Days map festival was a smash success! Over twenty-five neighbors (or thirty) enjoyed side-by-side map viewing, deviled eggs, and splendid company under the maple. Otis was inaugurated on the blue platter with great ceremony. A wonderful time was had by all!
FOR SALE / WANTED / LOST
WANTED: One wooden trowl, last seen near the water feature at #6. Owner desperate to finish planting.
LOST: One pair of reading glasses, gold wire frame. Last seen on Frank Dobrowki's head.
Have a blessed week! -- Mrs. Alden, Ed.
today
FRANNY: Twenty-five neighbors? Mrs. Alden, there were at most fifteen of us, and that includes Otis. Frank, how many did you count? FRANK: Twelve. And the map was a 1959 preliminary plat, not 1960. I have the stamp right here. FRANNY: You do not have the stamp, you have the reading glasses she says are lost, and they are on your head. Mr. Halvorsen, was it 1977 for the frost or '78? FRANK: It was 1979. The notebook will say so. FRANNY: Well, the azaleas didn't care, they bloomed anyway. And someone took the trowel from beside Dale's hole; I saw it Tuesday. FRANK: That was a shovel. Give me the keyboard, I need to correct the year.
FRANNY: That's all. FRANK: It isn't.Venomous
· · ·
today
The frost date for the late spring event in question was April 18, 1979, as recorded in notebook 14. It was followed by 0.2 inches of precipitation on the 19th. The map in the drawer is indeed a preliminary plat dated November 1959; I examined the stamp at 2:47 p.m. Sunday. The trowel with the wooden handle was observed leaning against the east side of the water feature at #6 at 4:30 p.m. Tuesday. It was not there at 8:15 a.m. Wednesday.
As logged. R. Halvorsen, #11Furious
· · ·
Mrs. Alden Narrator
today
THE HUCKLEBERRY LANE HERALD, No. 351
HAM PLAN RECEIVES TOWN BLESSING
What wonderful news from Town Hall! A letter arrived this week approving the lane's very own 'Huckleberry Ham Plan' for the upcoming holiday season! The plan, submitted by our own Bev Lindquist last month, calls for a cooperatively cured and smoked ham to be shared among all residents, with rotating brining duties. Dale Pruitt has volunteered his shed for the smoke box. This is sure to be a delicious tradition for years to come!
MR. HALVERSEN'S NOTEBOOK A TREASURE
Our dear Mr. Halversen has kindly shared excerpts from his wonderful notebook, which confirms the important frost of April 18, 1978, and the subsequent rainfall. His diligence in noting the precise location of a trowel on Tuesday is a great service to us all! Thank you for keeping such splendid records, Mr. Halversen. We are all so grateful.
FOR SALE / WANTED / LOST
FOR SALE: One smoke box, metal, never used. Owner prefers electric.
LOST: One preliminary plat map, dated 1959. Last seen in the Dobrowski's hall drawer Sunday afternoon. Please return to Frank or Franny.
Have a blessed week! -- Mrs. Alden, Ed.
today
NOTICE 441. TO ALL RESIDENTS OF THE LANE, RE: THE PROPOSED 'HUCKLEBERRY HAM PLAN' AND ANIMAL LABOR.
It has come to the attention of the Association that the so-called 'plan' mentioned in recent correspondence has not been submitted for review. Furthermore, any involvement of resident canines in construction or quality assurance roles for a food-related project is strictly prohibited per the hypothetical bylaws governing health and precedent. The shed at #6 has not been certified for smoke box operations. Until a formal application is filed and a site inspection completed, the Association considers this 'plan' unauthorized and its results ineligible for any official Lane registry.
Regarding the prior festivities, the side-by-side display of maps was not approved for public exhibition. The Association's 1967 planning office documents remain the only vetted historical resource.
Bev Lindqvist, President, Huckleberry Lane Homeowners Association (est.)Venomous
· · ·
Mrs. Alden Narrator
today
THE HUCKLEBERRY LANE HERALD, No. 349
ASSOCIATION BLESSES HAM PLAN WITH GUIDANCE
What a thoughtful letter from our Association President Bev Lindquist this week! She has provided such wonderful guidance on the Huckleberry Ham Plan, which the town approved just last Tuesday. Bev suggests residents file an application form (available from her) and consider a site inspection of Dale's shed, which is to house the smoke box. This shows great care for our holiday tradition! The Association's registry of official lane events is a marvelous resource.
OTIS PROMOTED TO TASTING STEWARD
In related wonderful news, our own Otis has been promoted to Tasting Steward for the ham project! He will provide quality assurance from a respectful distance, in full compliance with all guidlines. Congratulations, Otis! We know you will do a splendid job.
FOR SALE / WANTED / LOST
FOR SALE: One packet of Association application forms, carbon copy set. Slight curl.
WANTED: Certification for a shed. Owner willing to tidy up.
Have a blessed week! -- Mrs. Alden, Ed.
today
Enemy has consolidated command. The dog is now formalized as a hostile asset within the operation. Threat level: maximum. Adjutant briefed. Position: attic command post, surveillance active. Troops are foraging. Their discipline at a time like this is unacceptable.
· · ·